That moment in time is seared in my memory. I was sitting on the steps to a spiral staircase next to my dad's favorite, worn out lounge chair. I had recently moved back home after deciding to end a 5 year marriage that could have been a script for a "made for tv" movie. I was finally opening up to my dad about what had driven me to finally leave. I had gotten up the courage to stand up against the emotional, verbal and physical abuse and put myself first.
The silence hung thick in the air while he crafted his response. Then he said it. He said the unspeakable to me, "well, Suzi, you must have done something to deserve it."
My throat squeezed tightly as I struggled not to sob, not to lash out and defend myself. I knew damn well that no one ever deserved to be treated the way I had been treated. I was angry, dismayed and crushed all at the same time. Every negative emotion I had ever felt pulsed through my body seeking a way out.
(This article originally appeared on goddessarriving.com on 11/2/17)
A few months back I bought this cute, little citrus juicer. It's purpose is to not only extract the juice from the fruit, but also provide a way of storing the extra juice. I don't know about you but if I'm going to go through all of the effort of squeezing a bunch of limes for a recipe and I only need a quarter cup, I sure as hell don't want to dump the leftovers down the sink. I always believe there must be some other recipe that can use up the extra juice.
So this practical impulse buy was the first thing I thought of when I watched a video this morning of Wayne Dyer on "Writing from Your Soul.
He has a profound metaphor that I am being called to share.
My delicious citrus chicken recipe calls for the juice of several lemons and limes and a splash of tequila which I usually leave out. Let's just say tequila and I parted ways in my twenties.
Anyway, when I squeeze the lemons and the limes I expect lemon and lime...
(This article originally appeared on goddessarriving.com on 10/25/17)
Twenty-four years ago I chose to be a stay-at-home mom. I was thirty years old and the sparkle of my corporate job had lost its shine. I was ready to devote my energy into our growing family. Even though it meant our household income was going to be cut by two-thirds, my husband was completely on board with my decision.
It was a struggle financially, but my greatest challenge had nothing to do with money and everything to do with my worth.
I had always attached my worth to my accomplishments and my paycheck. Even though I was raised to believe I could do or be anything I wanted, this didn't include being a stay-at-home mom. Being the first person in my family on both sides EVER to graduate from college, my father felt I was wasting my education by staying home to raise my kids.
This was in the early 90's at the height of the "mommy wars" so I also felt judged by the community I left behind. It seemed to be...
I just came across this draft of a post I wrote in the throes of some family drama back in May. As I read it to my middle daughter we laughed looking back at how crazy things were at that time and how we can joke about it now. Although the event has passed, the lesson is eternal. So here's to the family muck that keeps us all stuck together!
(This article originally appeared on goddessarriving.com on 8/30/17)
It's 10:24 pm and I'm sitting here in bed with my sacred "white space" wanting to rant and rave about the roller coaster ride that is my life with three daughters.
They are mostly grown at this point. My oldest turns 22 on Sunday, my middle daughter turns 19 1/2 on the same day and my youngest just turned 16. It's an estrogen bonfire but since my own estrogen levels are no longer capable of maintaining my "feminine balance" I guess I'm grateful for the contact high.
Anyway, I seem to be standing somewhere on the precipice between being a great mom and being a psy...
(This article originally appeared on goddessarriving.com on 6/16/15)
My eldest budding goddess, who has just barely crossed over the threshold of adulthood, has once again impressed me with her "old soul" wisdom.
She recently sent me a text of what she labeled "the world's most accurate watch" followed by a picture of the timepiece pictured above. She insisted she had to have one and my heart smiled knowing that she is learning a life-altering lesson at the tender age of twenty-one. A lesson most people aren't aware they need to learn and most die without ever comprehending it's gifts.
See, Juliana's best friend, Katie, was diagnosed with leukemia about three months ago; a diagnosis that rocked everyone's world. No one ever expects a cancer diagnosis, especially for a vibrant, beautiful twenty-one year old college student. But there are no words to describe how that one freaking word, that freaking C-word, changes lives. It's life-sucking and life-generating all at t...